Anxiety in Pregnancy

I am now 30 weeks pregnant - hooray! This has made me think about the exciting and scary concept which is giving birth. 

Given previous history with anxiety and depression I alerted my midwife to this early in pregnancy (booking in at 7 weeks). So far I have had 2 really awful days with anxiety. Fortunately I had my mum to calm me down the first time and then my husband came home the second time for an hour. Once I'd had help to get into the shower, I could then think about how to tackle the problem i.e. ringing around the labour ward and midwives to discuss pain in my tummy.  

I think given our difficult journey to get here, I am petrified that something is going to happen to the baby or me and it can get a bit much. 

Things I've been doing to try and relax:

• speak to my husband / other people about my worries
• taking time to breathe
• writing lists - tackling one thing at a time
• realising that these feelings of worry are normal
• avoiding people who make me feel negative / down

Am just going to monitor how things go and keep DH in the loop.Hopefully knowing more from my consultant and anaesthetist in the next few weeks will help mee get my head around the transition from pregnant lady to mummy! 

x

Week 24 - Viable Baby

I haven't written another post since 16 weeks, oops! Thought since baby became viable at 24 weeks I ought to update. 

In the last 8 weeks - 

• I developed pgp / spd and was signed off work. It is especially painful at night and getting in and out of bed. Climbing the stairs is also very difficult. I am learning new techniques to manage the pain and my husband has been a Godsend. Things which help are; heat (heat pad / bath), foam mattress topper, gym ball, dream genii and pillows and using crutches. Using a support made it worse so I ditched it after a week or so! 
• A week after being told this, we had our 20 week scan and were told we're having a baby boy :) Was so relieved to hear that everything was fine with Bump and particularly excited to have a little boy. 

• Started shopping for dinky clothes including DH's favourite cardigan :)

Went to a sling workshop and got my standard Connecta in the post! So excited. We are using a pram and baby wearing depending on situation. We live in a village so it'll make popping to the corner shop a little bit easier hopefully. 

• DH started on the nursery which will hopefully be a bit closer to being done at the weekend. 

Getting super excited for LO's arrival but am still worrying over the fact that the Dr's want me to go for an early epidural which doesn't really fit with what I wanted i.e. as unmedicated as possible but I don't want to go under general anaesthetic. Will know more about this in August. Have been reading some books about childbirth in preparation which support the kind of birth I'd like but we will see! 

x 

16 Week Appointments

Had a very vague letter from the hospital requiring my presence yesterday. First off I forgot my purple notes, only remembering when I stood up to the reception desk. Then was told I should have brought a pee sample (nothing written in the letter!). 

We then spent 45 minutes wondering what the appointment was for. Finally my obs were done. Normal blood pressure (usually I'm on the low side), normal weight gain and protein in my wee (which they said was normal?).

And then we got to see the doctor. "Why do you think you've been sent to me as a high risk patient?" Er, I was kind of hoping you would tell me but I'll reel off the list... Back / hip problems, underweight at start of pregnancy, diabetes in my family... 

So I've been referred on to a physiotherapist due to skeletal problems and the fact I might not be able to get into some birthing positions. She also suggested an active labour would be best and I can push rather that go for a c-section straight away. However I would probably have to have an early epidural as I have a rod in my back and they don't want to put me under general if they can help it. Kind of throws my hypnobirthing plan out of the window :( but as long as Baby K gets here safely and healthy I shouldn't worry!

Also saw baby on the scanner again as she couldn't get them to stay still for the doppler. Saw the wriggling and the heartbeat and their ribcage was so clear. Baby doesn't just look like a collection of blobs any more, they have real waving hands. 

Tomorrow is the midwife appointment so will share all this info with her and hope the doppler works!!

x

Being Ill When You're Pregnant

Well I am now into the full swing of having a cold for the 4th time since becoming pregnant :( Sadly coughing in the morning has made my morning sickness slightly worse. Ick!

I have unfortunately passed this onto my poor husband who has been keeping me awake with his snoring, dry cough and sleep talking (something about fashionable dentistry last night!). Bless him!

Unlike DH who can take medicines for his sickness, I am left a bit bereft in that department! I have been avoiding taking paracetamol apart from when I have a high temp. Other remedies I've been using:

• hot water with a teaspoon of manuka honey 
• steam / sitting in the bathroom when DH has a hot bath
• relaxing in the evenings
• sleeping when I can especially naps on days off
• continuing my multivitamins
• balmy tissues - a little bit of luxury to avoid getting such a red nose!

I have a hen do and mothers day to celebrate this weekend so want to be over this snottiness already. Also hoping DH is better for his last hockey game of the season. 

Think healthy thoughts!

X

Dating Scan

This is our little one at 13 weeks and 4 days :) I had been so anxious leading up to the scan but was so relieved when the sonographer said all looked well. Looking forward to the next scan (they couldn't give me a date) where we will (hopefully) find out the sex. I am certain it's a boy though!

I had my first blood test where I didn't cry / freak out which is a major step for me as a needlephobe! Should get our NT result within the next couple of weeks. 

I have started feeling flutters in my lower abdomen which I think is baby but we'll soon know! Feels like a tickling / bubbly sensation. 

The baby's due date has now been changed to my 28th Birthday! (21st September). Will be interesting to see when s/he arrives. The sonographer said that first babies tend to be late but my sister, my husband and I were all early.

We told our parents and siblings then Facebook on Thursday. It was a busy evening telling everyone but they were all really shocked / pleased. My dad was speechless! My sister cried. It was lovely finally telling people.

All grandparents are trying to work out what they would like to be called in the meantime. 

Tomorrow DH and I are going to Southampton to test drive prams and try and hone down what we actually want / can afford. Can't wait!!

X

Week 11

Since that initial post there have been several updates;

Morning sickness came, was terrible and then disappeared around week 8. It then came back and the last couple of days have been slightly better. I've had about 5 sick days as I couldn't sit up without heaving. I've also been sick 3 times at work which is pretty horrible. 

I've had 2 scans so far. One due to spotting / bleeding at 6 weeks. Baby was a tiny jelly bean. The other was at 9 weeks and Baby K was a wriggling, jiggling thing which had doubled since the previous scan. (Still tiny) Heartbeat was seen both times. I am so anxious to see the baby again. My scan is 2 weeks from today. Then we can tell everyone! (hopefully if all is well)

I went to a baby show with my best friend and was completely overwhelmed by the amount of choice there is! We have to choose the type of nappies, feeding, sleeping arrangements, car seats, prams, clothing, sterilising equipment etc etc etc. It made my head spin! Although it was brilliant to get catalogues and share these with my husband. 

2 people at work have asked me straight out if I am pregnant and I have told them yes but to keep it quiet for a little longer. My eating habits have definitely changed and I no longer fit into my size 8 jeans. I have had to have the button undone with a child's hair bobble holding me together! I am also really aware of how few long-bodied tops I have and these keep riding up. In response to these things I have bought 3 belly bands to elongate tops, 3 maternity vests for the future and a pair of size 8 under bump jeans. I've gone with New Look as they actually have leg lengths you can choose as not everyone is an average 32"! I can still have short legs during my pregnancy without having to roll the bottoms up - hooray!

Tomorrow is going to be a busy day as I am going in to University to discuss all the required paperwork needed for me to pass my Early Years Teacher course. I will also still need to do the interview, setting visit and observation and am slightly stressed out about it.

Other than that DH and I are taking our guinea pig to the vet, going out for lunch, seeing The Book Thief at the cinema and I am getting my eyebrows done. 

Think that is probably enough for now!

x

My first BFP!

My husband and I have been trying for Baby K for 16 months and were diagnosed with primary infertility last year. We somehow have gone against what the doctors speculated (IVF / drugs to aid fertility after 3 year of trying) and we found out on Monday that I'm around 5 weeks pregnant! 

So far I've had very sore breasts, itchy skin (which went after a week, thank goodness!), constipation and fatigue. Tiredness seems to be the worst of these as I just want to crash after a couple hours of being awake! Hopefully this will get better. 

I've also had a bit of pain on the left side of my lower abdomen which I'm just keeping an eye on. 

I am going to use this blog to write about my experiences so I can look back and see what it was like :)

Can't wait for a proper scan to confirm everything! 

x